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The thing I like about diaryland is the anonymity of it all. I don't tell anybody I know in "real life" about this diary. No, that's not true. I've told one person, who was nice enough to never read it again after I asked her not to. She is also the subject of this, and many other recent entries. I wrote her a letter tonight, but I couldn't bring myself to send it, so I posted it here as yet another artifact of my private life:

Lisa,
I've got a few quick things to say. If you respond to this, I would prefer that you don't go into detail, because we've both got our own lives to live, and I would really like for our interactions to get away from this emotional focus.

1) When you said that you felt like you were in a movie, and that my words sounded scripted, that hurt. I was being honest; I was giving you my heartfelt reaction. I was not a piece of art for you to critique.

2) I want to be your friend again someday, and everyday I think that day has almost arrived, but right now, even seeing your livejournal post is enough to cause my heart to break all over again. When I said I'm very choosey about who I fall for, I meant that I'm usually very emotionally cut off, and that I've only felt like this for two or three other girls in my lifetime. The time we spent together made me feel so high. You will always be precious to me.

3) There was going to be a three, but this letter is killing me already. Just thinking about you amplifies my emotions. You made me feel things I would have otherwise choosen not to.

tony

P.S. This could take me awhile. I'm already apologizing to the next girl or three who gets intimate for me.